"I heard a fly buzz when I died"

A reviewer wrote two beautiful sentences in the latest issue of the Economist, "Emily Dickinson, a 19th-century poet, thought that poets, at their best, "rinsed the language". They made language anew by cleansing it of the accumulated crud of cliché, sloppiness and general woolliness."

Reading those lines reminded me of when in the tenth grade I read Dickinson's poem "I heard a fly buzz when I died." Wow, I remember thinking. Just plain wow.

I confess to being equally overwhelmed when I read "Su historia es que sorprende que considera él y sus padres vinieron de Cuba con apenas las ropas en sus partes posterioras." The preceding grammatical train-wreck is the product of an automated software translation and was included in a pitch letter to an editor from a PR agent. Fluency in Spanish would actually be a hindrance when it comes to understanding the letter. Other choice translations were "ventilador" for fans of the sporting variety and "negocio poseído minoría" for minority-owned business. The problem with the last nonsensical translation is that insomuch as it means anything at all it could be understood as "a business possessed by less than a majority of demons."

I am told the fellow who sent the pitch very clearly meant no disrespect. Quite the contrary. Furthermore, he openly acknowledged using a software translation program. For now, though, using such a program produces baffling and unintended results steeped in "general woolliness."

Better to just send the note in proper English.